Wait
by jberkey
Summary: yes, another one of those Watershed post-eps...
1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note: I haven't written in almost a year, so please be kind. Here's my thoughts on how this may play out in September! Please review! **

**Disclaimer: I bow down to the genius that is Andrew Marlowe.**

They met at the swings. For some reason, the swings always brought her clarity. Maybe it was because her mother used to bring her to the park on her day off and push her on the swings until little Katie's eyes drooped, sleepy and happy. Or maybe it was because the first bricks of her emotional wall were dislodged here after her shooting and Rick's _Heat Rises_ signing. Or maybe even more so because she sat there on those swings in the pouring rain and realized that her life was worth more than her mother's murder, that Rick was all she wanted. Whatever the reason, the swings seemed appropriate for whatever lay ahead for her and Castle.

A job in DC with the Federal Bureau of Investigation. That was big. And she beat out everyone else to earn her place there. She couldn't just ignore that accomplishment, could she? But there was Castle to think about, a five-year history with one of those years being filled with romantic vacations, kisses, new traditions, and love. They'd hit a rough patch recently, first Erik Vaughn and the jealousy he elicited from Rick, followed by the bomb case where everything seemed to be on track again until Agent Stack planted a seed in Kate's brain about being "destined to greater things." She just didn't know anymore where she and Rick were headed. She knew what she wanted and inquired of him, but he either didn't understand what she was asking or was worried about disappointing her with his answer. Was Rick getting bored with her? Did he even want or think about where they would be as a couple in a year? Or five years?

Clearly, he had thought about it, because there he was, knelt on one knee in front of her with a ring and a question.

"Katherine Houghton Beckett, will you marry me?"

She was stunned; stunned into silence. Honestly, she thought he was about to break up with her. The tears had already started welling up, the rims of her eyes quickly gaining a red tint. Rick had given no indication that this was coming, especially after he left her alone in her apartment after finding her boarding pass. She knew that a job in DC either meant a long distance relationship or no relationship at all. Castle is a passionate man, a man who needed his family and loved ones close by. Meredith had been in and out of their home for auditions and jobs when they were married and that didn't well at all. Kate couldn't see him trying a long distance relationship ever again so when Rick said he wanted more, that they both deserved more, Kate was all but convinced he was walking away. But it was the exact opposite.

It was a white gold ring, with a large oval cut diamond in the center with four smaller diamonds surrounding it, two rows of diamonds on the band. It was beautiful. It was perfect for her. It was classy and romantic, worthy of Richard Castle, but not too big. It was perfect. But this was not the perfect moment. This wasn't how it was supposed to go. She was about to accept a job offer in another state. She thought he was going to walk away. She was not expecting this at all.

But his eyes, they said everything. There was hurt there, but there was also love, desperation, and the terror of possibly losing her. There was no joking around, there was no smile, just sincerity. Kate had been wondering where he wanted them to go in their relationship, and now she had her answer, or at least part of it.

"Kate?"

His voice broke her thoughts. Her eyes lifted from the ring in his hand to meet his dark blue-grey eyes. "Rick," she paused, "get up, please."

His face fell, his eyes loosing any of the sparkle they had left, as he stood from his knelt position to return to the seat of the swings. Sunlight hit the diamond ring as he toyed with it in his lap.

"Rick…"

"You don't want it," he cut her off before she could finish. His eyes never left his hands as he placed the ring in his palm, and closed it into a fist. "I'll just…" he started, as he began to stand up.

"No," Kate said firmly as she reached over, placing her hand on top of his fist that held the ring intended for her. He sat back down and finally looked her in the eye. "I do want more," she continued, "I want more from you, from us, but I also want more from myself." Her hand stayed on his, her thumb running circles on his skin in the most familiar of ways. "I didn't tell you about the interview right away because I wasn't sure I wanted it. I didn't want to throw a wrench in our relationship without first figuring out what it meant and what it would change if I did want the job. And, yes, that was a mistake. I should have told you when you asked what Agent Stack talked to me about. I didn't want to ruin us."

He looked away from her again, not able to hold her gaze any longer.

"Because, Rick," she continued, as she moved her hand to open his fist, "I want this. I want what this ring means. Just not yet." She closed his fist again, the ring still tightly held within his grasp. "We have a lot to work out, Castle."

His eyes snapped back up to meet hers as she continued to speak, "I got the official job offer."

Rick blinked hard and placed the ring in the pocket of his suit jacket.

_**TBC**_

**Please tell me what you think! Like I said, I haven't written in over a year, so I'm probably very rusty, and this has not been beta-d. Updates should come relatively quickly, only a few chapters total. **


	2. Chapter 2

**Author's Note: yay chapter 2! Let me know how I did and leave a review! This has not been beta-d.**

**Disclaimer: if I owned Castle, I wouldn't be writing fanfiction. **

"And you decided to take it?" Rick asked after he secured the ring he bought especially for her, back in his suit jacket. He looked the same as he had since she arrived, stone cold expression, dark eyes, serious.

"I thought I had. I met with my dad today. He always has a way of talking sense into me. And he reminded me that I've never had a relationship like this one, like ours. He said that I hide in my work when I get scared. I guess I knew that on some level, but to hear it flat out like that made me think. He told me to make the decision based on what I really want and not what I was afraid of. I decided that this was my last case."

"Kate, I told you whatever you decide, whatever happens, I…"

She silenced him before he could continue. "Rick, wait. Slow down. I heard what you said, believe me. But let me finish, please. I was wrong. Choosing between my job and my heart…its almost impossible."

"I'm not giving you an ultimatum. I'll go wherever you go. I just want you, Kate."

"That sounds familiar," she said, a small smile gracing her lips as she remembered last year. "And I'm grateful that you are willing to uproot your life for me. But you know me, Castle. I always have one foot out the door." She made sure he was looking her directly in the eyes before she continued, "I'm afraid. I'm afraid of loving someone just to have them get pulled away, like my mother was. So I self-sabotage. I saw this job offer as a way out, a way to hurt myself before you could potentially hurt me." Kate's eyes drifted down to her hands, resting in her lap, nervously picking at her nails.

Castle could see how hard this was for her, could see the conflict she was faced with. She wanted more, but she was scared to risk what they already had to see what they could become.

"Kate, you're not the only one who is afraid. And you're not the only one who went to their parent for advice," he said, as she lifted her head to look at him once again, a slight sparkle returning to her eyes. "Mother knocked some sense into me too. She calls you Katherine. In a nice way! She's never spoken so kindly about any of the women I've dated. You're different. Mother told me that you should be interviewing for that job, you are ambitious, and strong, and holding you back from being yourself is wrong. I thought this problem of ours, this job interview, was all about you and had nothing to do with anything I was doing wrong."

He swung his feet nervously, trying to maintain her eye contact as best he could before he continued on, "Trust Mother to slap some sense into me. I was doing something wrong. I was holding back, because I'm scared too. I mean, I have two ex-wives for heaven's sake! I was happy with where we were, I didn't want to push and end up scaring you away. I've pictured marrying you for years. But I couldn't get the picture of yet another divorce out of my head either. I didn't want you to become another ex-wife so I just pushed the idea of marriage out of the way."

"I'm not Meredith or Gina, Castle. We're different," Kate said intently.

"I know," he said, "I know you are."

"So, while it may be obvious now, I'm going to ask you again. Castle, where are we going?" Kate asked, her head tilting in order to catch his eyes.

He took a breathe, steeling himself before he spoke, before he did his best to put his feelings into the words he is so well known for. "I want you to move in, fully move in. I want a wedding in the Hamptons, your dad walking you down the aisle, and wedding bands engraved with 'Always.' I want a little boy with my looks but your eyes. I want a little girl with your gorgeous hair and face, an exact replica of you, but with my blue eyes. I want to grow old together, always waking up next to you and bringing you coffee with foam hearts. I want the life I've never allowed myself to have but always wanted."

Castle looked up to see Kate smiling ear to ear. He must have said something right! "See, all you had to do was say that a few weeks ago when I asked. We're terrible at this communication thing, Rick."

"Well, its your turn, keep this communication going. What do you want? Where do you want to go?"

"I want this job. But I want you more. I want the life you just described. The job is nice, extraordinary actually, but it would be nothing, _I_ would be nothing without the family I've created here in New York. I was going to take the job. But the interrogation room changed my mind; that is my home. It's where I make a difference. I walked out of there, and I saw Ryan and Esposito, my brothers for all intents and purposes. I wouldn't have them or anyone like them in DC. I wouldn't be around long enough to make friends as good as them. And I would have no time in DC for you. And that hurt my heart to think about. You've ruined me for anything else. I can't be happy anywhere without you."

She reached over to lace her fingers with his before continuing, "I want that little boy you described. He'd be just like his dad, a laugher, a little guy obsessed with the strange. I want that little girl; she'd be inquisitive, always wanting answers to her burning questions. They'd be happy kids. They _will _be happy kids, because Rick, we will get there. Just not yet. Give us some time."

His eyes were rimmed with red, his grey-blue irises shining with tears unshed. "How much time?"

"I don't know, Castle. You'll figure it out. We need to repair what we've damaged before we can be strong enough together to make a marriage and a family happen," Kate said, squeezing his hand gently.

"So, it's not a no?"

"No, it's an 'ask me later.'" She stood up from her seat on the swings and stood in front of him, grabbing the chains of his swing to ground them. "You keep it," she said as she lowered her hand to feel the outline of the ring in the breast pocket of his jacket, "and ask me later."

"I will," he said, standing up so they're eyes were level. "But Kate? Can I ask you something else?"

She looked at him, tilting her head to prompt him along. "Move in with me?"

Kate smiled again, her eyes squinting. "Let's go home, Castle," she said before closing the distance between them and kissing him lightly on the lips. She'd missed him over the past week. But now she was confident in them, in what they had, and what they were going to become. They were on the same page. And now they had work to do. Work on their relationship but also work to do in boxing up her apartment and making the loft _their_ home.

_Home._

**So…..there you have it! But there WILL be an EPILOGUE coming shortly so don't miss it! I hope they didn't seem too OOC, but they needed to talk, and since they rarely ever talk about the hard stuff on screen, I wasn't too sure how to portray it, but I hope it worked! Please review! I have lots to learn and would love any input! **

**You can follow me on twitter, at JennaBerkey**


	3. Epilogue

**Here you go friends! The epilogue of my Watershed post-ep! Enjoy and please review!**

**Disclaimer: if only…**

She woke up warm, despite sleeping in her grey linen shorts and soft over the shoulder pink jersey top. It was her favorite outfit to sleep in, for multiple reasons. The morning sunlight streamed through the windows, but that light was not the source of her warmth. It was Castle, with his arm wrapped around her middle, his body pressed against hers, as he brushed his chin, rough with morning stubble, across her shoulder, ghosting his lips in small kisses.

Kate smiled at the feeling, her eyes still closed against the morning sun. "Hey," she mumbled.

"Hi," he replied, as he hand moved from her torso up her arm. Her eyes slid open as she turned around in bed to meet his eyes. "Good morning," he said, "you want pancakes?"

She hummed her reply, snuggling closer into his body.

"Okay, stay here, I'll bring breakfast to you," he said, before leaning in to give her a soft kiss and getting up from the bed and heading towards the kitchen.

Kate watched him leave, smiling at how adorable he was in his plaid pajama pants and grey v-neck tee. When he was gone, she turned over again in bed, checking her phone resting on her bedside table. When she looked through her messages—nothing pressing, no body drop—she noticed the sunlight streaming in, illuminating the small black velvet box that rested there.

It's been almost five months since Castle had gotten down on one knee and asked her to marry him; five months since she told him to hold onto the ring for a later date; five months since she packed up her apartment, cancelled her lease, and moved in with Richard Castle. That ring box has sat, unopened, on her bedside table since that day. Rick had placed it there, without saying a word, after she had finished getting ready for bed on their first night in _their_ home. It was a reminder to her that they were on the same page, that no matter how little they actually said the words, they loved each other, and they were headed towards marriage and a family.

They had talked a lot over the past five months. He finally told her the entire story about his ex-wives and why their marriages didn't work. He let out all of his insecurities and she broke down the walls he had around his own heart. She on the other hand, was a bit more reluctant to let everything out, which he understood. Like he said five months ago, that's who she is. He continued to scratch and crawl through that wall, and it was completely worth it. Kate was opening up, telling him about her sessions with Dr. Burke and more stories about her childhood and her mother.

They were extremely happy. Communication had done wonders for them.

Kate looked over her shoulder towards the kitchen. She heard Rick singing quietly, assuring her that he was busy making pancakes and wouldn't surprise her by coming in the room. She turned back towards her bedside table, supported her weight on her elbow, and lifted the small ring box from its place. Popping the lid open, Kate's eyes sparkled with tears she wouldn't let shed, the corners of her mouth lifting up into a small smile. That day, five months ago, Rick had mentioned the little children he imagined, little carbon copies of them. She could see those kids in her mind, a stronger and clearer picture of them in her mind everyday. But there was an image even more clear in her mind.

The Hamptons. Rick in a sleek black suit, a white button down, with a purple tie. Alexis, Lanie, and Jenny in purple bridesmaids dresses. Ryan and Esposito standing next to Rick, smiling and fist bumping. A chair left empty for her mother in the front row. Her father walking her down the aisle, tears in his eye. A white dress.

Kate ran her finger over the large center diamond on the ring as she imagined this day. She plucked the ring out of the box, watching the light bounce off of it as she moved to place it on her left ring finger. She was so enamored with the way it looked on her hand and the wedding day she was imagining her in mind that she didn't hear Rick stop singing and pad his way towards her in their bedroom. He noticed what she was looking at and paused in the doorway. Smiling, he decided it was better to leave her be, return to the kitchen, and not say a word. Rick took one last look at her and returned to the kitchen.

Kate removed the ring from her finger and placed it back in the box, thinking about all that they had been through in the past five years. She was ready.

"Kate? You better not have gone back to sleep! Breakfast is coming!" she heard Rick yell from the kitchen. Turning her head back towards the doorway quickly to make sure he hadn't seen her with the ring, She placed it back on the bedside table, being sure that it was back in its original position, before fully sitting up in bed, pillows stacked behind her back for support.

Just then, Rick appeared in the doorway, carrying a tray piled high with pancakes and strawberries, two coffees, and the morning's New York Ledger. He smiled wide at her and placed the tray in her lap before rounding the bed to get back under the covers on his side.

"Good morning again, beautiful!" he said, before leaning in for another kiss.

"Hey. Thanks for the pancakes. Are you coming into the precinct this afternoon? How long is your meeting with Paula?"

After swallowing his bite of pancake, Rick replied, "I have that meeting with Paula at eleven and then a meeting with Black Pawn at two. I should be done by four if you're still at the precinct."

"Don't worry about it, I'll be done by five, so I'll just meet you at home for dinner?"

"Sure, that sounds great. Now eat," he said, handing her a strawberry.

It had been a long day of paperwork for Kate. Luckily, no murderers decided to make their work known, so she headed home to the loft a little after five o'clock. She unlocked the door and walked in, immediately confronted with the beautiful smell of Castle's famous lasagna. But Rick was nowhere to be found. She removed her jacket, hung it in the front closet, and made her way to Rick's office (which had become more of _their_ office in recent months), thinking he was busy writing a chapter of his latest Nikki Heat novel. When she didn't find him in there, she continued on into their bedroom to plug in her phone. Her brow furrowed when she didn't find Rick in the bedroom either. Kate grabbed her phone charger from the bedside table when she noticed something was off.

The ring box was gone.

"Rick?" she called out. "Rick? Where are you?"

She quickly walked out into the living room and towards the kitchen, stopping when she noticed Rick sitting on the steps that headed to the second floor. He was smiling at her, the laugh lines around his eyes making themselves known. He was wearing her favorite dress shirt—deep purple—with the top few buttons undone, with dark wash jeans. Kate had to hand it to him, he had some very ruggedly handsome looks. Castle stood up, walked down the few steps, and over to Kate, who was looking at him slack-jawed and happy.

"Kate," he started when he got to her, taking her hands in his, "You told me five years ago that you were the one and done type. And almost two years ago, you told me that the third time might be the charm. I think it will be too." He took her by the hand to bring her to sit next to him on the couch.

"I've made a lot of mistakes in my life. But you are not a mistake. You are far from it. We've been through a lot, but everything that happened, led us to right now," he said, his smile never leaving his face. "I saw you this morning, looking at the ring. It's been five months since I put that ring box on your bedside table, and it never moved. But this morning, you opened it. And I knew you were ready, that we were ready. So I've asked you this before and I've held a few rings in front of you in the past five years, but I hope this will time will turn out the best."

He got up from the couch to kneel on one knee in front of her, taking his left hand in his right, as he reached in his pocket with his free hand. "I love you, Katherine Houghton Beckett. Will you marry me?"

She smiled wide, immediately framing his face with her hands, kissing him with all she had. When they separated, Kate kept their foreheads together, opening her eyes to look straight into his.

"I take that as a yes?" he asked, smiling.

"Yes."

They'd have it. The white dress and the black tux. The little boy and a baby girl. They'd have it all.

_Yes._

**There you have it! Please let me know what you think! I'm a summer writer due to my extra free time, so let me know if you've got suggestions or requests for any fics. Reviews make me extremely happy! **


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